~*R@in's BlOggiE*~

hm. juz now reached home at abt 11pm. got housekeeping duty today at sha villa. 1-9pm. today f/o got joyce and minah. at least not so boring. got frenz to chit-chat wit. actually today housekeeping nth much to do. lil' work. but good lo. keke. hm. at abt 9pm my dad & mum came & fetched me. so good. if i go home myself so sian man. hm. now bac home. chit chat abit in msn wit frenz. browsin thru frenster. and now updatin my lil' blog. tomoro still f/o got duty at sha villa sia. so sian. itz 8-4pm. den next week is my really last day at sha villa! kinda happy. hm. hope somebody is listenin to me in da blog. dun make me tok alone plz...

in places no one will find. all ya feelingz so deep inside. was now that i realised. that foreva was in ya eyez. the moment i saw ya cry. i wanted to hold ya. i wanted to make it go away. i wanted to know ya. i wanted to make ya everything all ritez... ____..: Ra|n :..____

hm. in skool now. comp lab. now havin cough. a bad headache too. arGh~ so pain. so tired. how i wish i'm at home now. so sad. toopid skool. now skool comp no frenster no msn messenger. banned everything many peepz r playin. toopid. nth beta to do. now so boring. cannot chat online in skool le. haiz. me now really sianz wor. head pain. heart pain. can somebody help m3?! i'm really tired. so boring. >_

kinda bored tiz few dayz. really beri tired. tired of skool. tired of dutiez. how i wish i can stay at home wit my mum. go shoppin. c moviez. relac. but now cannot sia. skool skool skool. hope da time will really fliez from now til next year nov and my attachment to hotel is finished! all salary taken and i'm free! hope time really fliez. not crawL!!

yOz. bac here again for updaTez. hM. today kinda happy. coz i gotta cut my frenz lovely hair. reena & daya. few dayz ago i oso did cut nurul'z fringe. kinda happy. thankz my lovely frenz who allow m3 & gave m3 da chance & opportunity to cut hair. today den i find that i really love to cut my frenz hair. quite fun. but i'm serious wen cuttin. ^-^ hm. (more specific). i cut nurulz fringe a lil' to make her looks more cuti3! hm. lessen reenaz hair coz her hair is thick. and oso. i finally get to cut dayaz hair. coz she everytime tie her hair. she nv had a chance to 'show off' her hair nicely. so i cut and layered her hair. now she got a fringe. a nicer hair. (which i think suitz her). wen i c her new hairstyle + look. i feel good & glad. juz wanna recall bac. da beri beri first person who allowz me to lay my hands on her hair is reena. tt time she suddenly ask me to cut. without any worriez. majiam i got hairstylin cert. i was so 'ya li'. but s...

hm. juz now was at changi airport doin duty from 12-8pm. hm. kinda bored there. but itz much more beta den sha villa. at changi airport i get to meet & communicate wit lotz of peepz. some r funny. some r frenly. some r fussy. & many wit blue eyez. loLx. nice working wit those supervisor. most r so nice. like patsy. norma. florence. rosnah. geok. etc. not like those at sha villa. not nice 1. all act act fierce. ka na sai wor. hmpH~ -_-. but no more airport duty le. bac to sha villa liao. sianz. tomoro bac to skool. hope i can make more new frenz in skool coz my many frenz r out of skool le. mostly at outletz. so gonna be boring in skool. hm... today gotta really bad gastric. coz since yesterday hadnt had a nice meal. only eat lite food. til today cannot tahan le coz really pain so i eat lo. now still pain sia. hm. ok la. gtg. will be bac soon. byE~

hm. today juz came bac from malaysia. tomoro got duty at changi airport. so sian man. somemore alone sia. can die of loneliness. -_-. thiz lil' msg is for lil' RaidaH:- thankz for giving comment to me (in ya blog). yea ya rite. we gotta move on wit life. and i know u guyz gonna be there for m3. in life. in fact many thingz dun go our way. but..yea. ttz really LIFE. thankz dear. but...y of all titlez u put 'move ya body gal'? loLx. anyway. c ya. hm. til now still sad. love went silent. where is my love. where r ya hiding. i dunno y. y love alwayz dun go my way. is that how love life should be? is love so complicated. difficulT. painful. hurtin'. if so. den y god made love? y he made us and make us difficult? y cant life go smoothly to wat i wan? erm. maybe god wanna c for us which is da rite 1. maybe he dun wan us ending up wit da wrong 1. maybe all da while he've been lookin out for us. itz juz tt we udn know and wanna blame him. but if hez rea...

*sigh. juz now presentation really ka na sai sia. the diskette is with yishan but she sick. so we gotta find our own wayz to present. mr. tham oso like dunno wat. da teacherz dun understand anything. only mr. lim is da best. he really understandz peepz. he's caring. not like otherz. hm.... i keep cryin these few dayz. dunno y. a lil' thing i will cry. wanna tahan my tearz oso dak boleh. went home oso cry. in class oso cry. haiz...but luckily i got my really understanding parentz who alwayz support m3. haiz. life really suxz. gotta study thingz tt i dun like. not my interest at all. -_-, hm........and oso...love. love life. suxz too. juz suxz. whoeva i wanz will leave & da onez stayin is not da one i love. why is love like tt? maybe itz juz life. but why...life is so difficult. haiz. juz hate love. love really makez me suffer. alot. how i wish there is no pain. no love. in life...

>_

hM. tis morning went to causeway point wit my elder sis to eat at Jack's Place. da food is nice. after that i went to sha villa for my duty & my sis went bac home. i supposed to start work at 2pm but i went here 1pm. now i'm still here at sha villa. today got no supervisor. soo good. met some new studentz from april intake class. quite fun doin my shift today. juz now breal time i ate spaghetti set! only $5. delicious. hm. today i ate lotza good food yo. keke. my duty finish at 10pm. 1 hour plus to go. later my dad will be here to fetch me to m'sia. den will be back in s'pore on tuesday. my cousin will be goin to m'sia too. my mum & aunt is aready there waiting. hm. wednesday got test. sianz. gotta bring my f/o book over to study. but i wun really study la. lolx. ^-^ anyway. will be bac here to update again. do miss m3...

juz came bac from NuruL'z uncle wedding (which suppose to be tomoro). not many peepz there. coz my classmatez will be there tomoro. i reach there abt 8+pm. sit there tok tok den eat den went up to nurulz house. her house quite nice. the living room wall is PINK!!! loLx. den at abt 9.30 den we leave. we did take some photoz there coz i was my very first invitation to a malay wedding. keke. luckily i bring syikin along abo i will be so lonely coz my frenz all goin there tomoro. somemore me only chinese there. so many peepz c. malu malu. keke. how i wish i can be there tomoro to c how is the wedding process done but cant. i've got duty. toopid. -_- haiz..now my eyez r soooo tired. tomoro sian sia. duty 2pm - 10pm. can die eh. den after duty my dad will be bring me to malaysia straight. i can c my mum! shez there noW. will be bac in tues ba. eveybody muz miss me yoz. but i doubt ya will. anyway. i'm really soo damn tired. wanna go now. niTeZ~

hm. in skool now. kinda bored here. later got lesson. i'm hungry. yummy. i'm juz bored. so bored.lunch soon. hm....i wanna eat. hm. makan makan. kuku. hoho. siaO! i miss many peepz man. *sigh. i wanna go overseas. hm. love juz suxZ! sux....u know?? u dun. toopiD~ no one understandz me. really no one. how i wish therez no tomoro for me. haiz. anyway. i gotta go makan now. will be bac soon~

YoyOz. m3 bac heRe. paSs fEw dayz kinda busy. wit sha villa duty. doin housekeepin'.but at least i had fun doin' tt. beta den at front office. stand stand & stand whole day. especially wit tt f*ckEr iDiotiC RizaL. aLwayz like to 'aCt'. & alwayz 'taRgetin' m3. WHY ME?!?! he alwayz ask me do toopiD thinGz. hAiz. wat to do. hAv to 'tahan'. but luckily at leAst mR. iThiN undErstand. buT nOt reaLLy understanD dA whoLe maTter. cOz i diDnt teLL him. *siGh. now. juz came bac. from sha villa. kinda tired. but had fun doin wit YisHan. shez funni.hM. laTer gonNa batHe. dEn c vCd. dEn coMe onLine. c iF i cAn meEt mY cOusin. miSs hEr rEaLLy aLot. hM. kinDa happY tO hEar fROm my mUm tT tz cOmin' thuRz mY paRentz gOnNa briNg m3 tO fiNd uncLe jiMmy. kinDa miZ hiM & dA tEmpLe. loNg timE nV gO theRe. lasT timE aLmosT everYdaY go theRe untiL laTe Late 1. hM. i uSed tO pLay 'pOoL' aT MiRaMar HoteL wiT dA pEopLe froM tT teMpLe. kinDa fUn. miZz dA tiMe...

yOz. Bac hoMe aT aBt 2+pM. nOw is aReaDy 3.10pM. jUz fiNisH wAshiNg dA baLcoNy. cHaNgiNg mY dOg'z ToiLet'z nEwpapEr. & nAgGinG @ mY bRo. *siGh. nOw HaviN' a hEadaChe. bUt kinDa haPpy cOz mY mUm'z cOmin' bAc toNitE!! LaTer gOnNa bAthE. SwEep + mOp dA fLoOr. iF gOt tiMe dEn gOnNa 'puLL' mY dOg tO sHoweR. aBo sMeLLy. hM. jUz nOw wEnt tO JuroNg EntErTainMent CentRe.whiLe watin fOr oUr tEacheR. wE wEnt uP tO c dA 'iCe sKatiNg'. hM. iT LoOkz KiNda fUn. bUt iT loOkz sLipPerY. PeEpz kEpt faLLin' dOwn. sO niCe. a 'aNg moH' Lil' gaL waVed aT mE. sO cUte neHz. hM. aFter waTchin iT. weNt dOwn tO PizZa hUt tO eAt wth mY whoLe cLaZz + cOurSe TuTor. hM. So fuLL. gOt tO eAt 'HaWaiaN' pErsOnaL pAn PizZa + PePs + CreAm oF cHicKen sOup + BreAdsTicK. hAd a gReaT LunCh. i fEeL tHat i'M QuiTe 'XiNg fU' lo. oSo dUnNo y. i tHink thInk oF LotzA tHingZ. sUdDenLy feeL liKe tT. mAybE iTz beCoz i hAv soMeonE liKe my DaD & MuM. mY Dad i...

hM. now. sOo rEaLLy lonely. aLL alone at homE. mY mum is iN BangkOk riTe now. mY eLder Sis is wt hEr. mY eLder bRo is oN duTy nOw aT ChanGi AirpOrt. mY dAd iS wOrkiNg. LeFt m3!! wt my cuTe+nOtti dOg. nOw i'M da onLy 'gaL' @ hoMe. i gOtta waSh dA cLotheZ. HaNg dEm' uP. waSh dA disHez. mAke aLL da bEdz. LoOk aFter mY dOg. & oSo mY dAd. gOtta gve hm taKe meDicinE as hE aLwayZ fOrgEt. tHs aLL are wAt mY mUmmy 'hAnd oVer' tO me. i'M nOt tirEd dOin thoSe. i'M jUz bOreD... i miZz mY mUm. wEn i cOme bAc fRom skOoL. i wiLL aLwayZ c hEr @ hOme. bUt nOw. nO oNe. onLy mY dAd & bRo. iTz liKe sO diFfereNt. hOw i wsh i wAs aT BanGkok wt her RiTe nOw. bUT aNywaY. sHe cOmin' bAc tOmoRo! yEsh! tOmorO! jUz tOmorO! KinDa Happy nOw. i'M eXcitEd fOr tOmoRo cOz...My wHoLe cLass iS gOnNa reLeaSed eArLy (aBt 11aM.) & wiLL be gOin tO JuRong cEntre @ JuroNg EasT tO eAt!! (fOr 'CTIS') i jUz liKe dA feeLing. gOin aS a BiG grOup Out tOg.. wE goNna eAt Piz...

Please mommy, do not cry For ages now I have wanted to die Please little brother, do not weep I was haunted with nightmares in my sleep Please daddy, do not get mad It was not your fault that I was so sad Please big sister, do not scream I tried to live but could no longer dream Please teacher, do not feel blame If you had tried the results would be the same Please best friend, do not miss me On this earth I just was not meant to be Please boyfriend, do not go insane There was nothing you in could do to ease my pain Please grandpa, do not live in regret Things happened to me that I couldn’t forget Please grandma, do not shed tears I have not felt happiness for many years Please uncle, do not ask why I am sorry that I never got to tell you goodbye Please auntie, do not grieve I made the decision myself, I wanted to leave Please cousin, do not follow me to the grave In the end to my depression I was a slave I am sorr...

So tired & stress nowadayz. my skool hourz is sooo long and by da time i reach home is aready nitE. but i'm excited about tis sunday! Manchester United is playinG! on da 25/7, 28/7 & got somemore! wow...but itz skool dayz..i'll be busy + tired..and again... PortugaL is playinG!! so happY!! but Ronaldo gonna miss da 1st four matches of Man U games. as he gotta pay for portugaL. 'Country comes 1st'. it'll be startin 1 Aug!! so excited!! i'm really lookin forward to it mAn! But my mUmMy is leaving S'pore for Bangkok for 4 dayz. from 25/7 to 28/7. me gonna miss her so much & she gonna miss da 2 Man U gamEz. i gotta watch alone...so sad...but itz soooo great tt i can c PortugaL pLay aGain!! ManchEster UnitEd tOo!! so hAppY!! ok yOz..me gTg..in cLass now..haVin lessOnz but i'm nOt listEning.. nOtti m3..keke..ok c yA!

yOz. raidah. hm. ur so welcome. hope u like da blog. hm. lolx. hope i'll meet ronaldo 1 daY?? i tink itz impossible. haiz. can only DREAM. anyway. c ya in skool!

hAiz. s|nce 5th juLy..i'vE been so sad. soo pain. so heartbroken. whY? becOz' of dA eUro 2004 finaL. portugal losT. i'M aReadY beRi sAd. dA 'pa|n tHiNg' iS...wEn i sAw c.RoNaLdo cRiEd...>_

Love is a word expressing feeling But now day's people use it as if it had no meaning This is sad I'll tell you why Now this word makes people cry It used to bring us tears of joy But now it's just a hurting toy People say it then take it back With no promise, just like that People say it to get what they want And then they say, "I love you not." I wish this word could mean what it means to me Or maybe this is how it's just going to be And the true meaning of this word inside my head is now and forever truly dead!