i dunno how to descride tt kinda feelin i hav. i juz hate life. hate myself. for wat i've done. i regreted. i broke da promise of my own. i broke my own valuez in life. da hatred in me. myself. alwaez swingz my mood. mkz me feel like endin my life. i cldnt face da world. i've done thingz i shldnt do. n i cant turn bac time. i can no longer tk bac da valuez i had. wat shld i do. i tried to except da fact. but wheneva it comez into my mind.. i wanna hurt myself. i juz feel da hatred in me. i am no longer wat i used to be. no more. im diff. no longer da same. i dun love myself. no more pride in life. hm. and for guyz. i still cant put myself into trustin guyz. is it me being biased. or my perception abt guyz for da bad thingz they do. i cld oni tell myself tt im dreamin. i can oni dream. of my ideal guy. for da high expectationz i hav in them. i want everything! but i know it will nv come true for me. coz no one showed me. no one proved me. tt they cld try their best to be da one of my dream. or bcoz tt da prob liez on me. my attitude. towardz da side of one'z behavior tt i dislike to c. it wld juz turn me off ezily. tink ttz wat mkz me fall out for ppl quickly. now i realised. hm. n oso. im juz too much. i expect them to understand me so well. tt even if i say "nah.." in my heart i mean 'yesh..'. n they wld notice tt i wanted smth tt i dun even hav to say i like n wld juz give me a surprise gettin it for me. they oni c wat i choose to show. but they juz dun read my heart. they dun c behind my smile. there r so much thingz.. they juz dun know. probably i've watched too much korean romantic dramaz. makin me expectin too much. frm thoz dramaz. which r all an act oni! hm. maybe stayin single is my fate. livin a pain life like mine hurtz.. i dun deserve to be loved.
spent my weekendz in msia. went there on sat aftnn. tiz time din go c da chinese doc. no time. kinda waste money too. hm. returned to spore tiz evenin. got home. left my stuffz le. koko drove me to NP. meetin weijie @ 6.15, mac.
me got there. saw shi gong wit his frenz. went to sit wit 'em. chit chat. weijie came @ abt 6.45pm. sat there waitin for alvin. he came @ abt 7.05pm. me alwaez wait for guyz de. slow. lolx. hm. alvin wj n me den go timezone boom boom while shi gong n his frenz dunno who where le. boomed a few gamez. cant managed to contact shi gong. bot ice blended oreo choco [long time no drink le o]. walked to 300+ de playgrd sit. chat. laughed. til abt 10+pm. they walked me home lo.
on sat. received the examination resultz slip frm MDIS.
Principlez of Accounting & Financing: A
Communication Skillz: B
glad tt i made it! relieved. but.... for tiz term... itz gonna be hard for my oncoming examz.
spent my weekendz in msia. went there on sat aftnn. tiz time din go c da chinese doc. no time. kinda waste money too. hm. returned to spore tiz evenin. got home. left my stuffz le. koko drove me to NP. meetin weijie @ 6.15, mac.
me got there. saw shi gong wit his frenz. went to sit wit 'em. chit chat. weijie came @ abt 6.45pm. sat there waitin for alvin. he came @ abt 7.05pm. me alwaez wait for guyz de. slow. lolx. hm. alvin wj n me den go timezone boom boom while shi gong n his frenz dunno who where le. boomed a few gamez. cant managed to contact shi gong. bot ice blended oreo choco [long time no drink le o]. walked to 300+ de playgrd sit. chat. laughed. til abt 10+pm. they walked me home lo.
on sat. received the examination resultz slip frm MDIS.
Principlez of Accounting & Financing: A
Communication Skillz: B
glad tt i made it! relieved. but.... for tiz term... itz gonna be hard for my oncoming examz.
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